More than anything in the world, I want my children to believe that they are loved by a good God who wants to have a loving relationship with them and who wants to bring forth only good in and out of their lives. But how will they believe that if my relationship with them is anything but believing, building up and loving? Second Corinthians 5:20 talks about how important this is: "We are therefore Christ’s ambassadors, as though God were making His appeal through us" (NIV). The Message Bible puts it this way: "We’re Christ’s representatives. God uses us to persuade men and women....We’re speaking for Christ himself now." So I started asking myself what representing Him would look like and what it might entail.
The way we represent God to our children is directly determined by what our own view of Him is. It is hard to represent God well if we don't know Him very well. It is hard to represent God well if we believe things that aren't true about Him. As I have been searching Him out, I have discovered three powerful truths about God's character that I want to reflect to my kids. I know there are innumerable qualities that make God who He is, but I will pick just three for now.
First, I came to realize that God is full of joy! For so long I thought He was extremely serious! But Zephaniah 3:17 says, "The Lord your God is with you, the Mighty Warrior who saves. He will take great delight in you; in His love He will no longer rebuke you, but will rejoice over you with singing" (NIV). And in Luke 15:6-9, when Father God finds His lost children, He cries out, "Rejoice with me!" One of the greatest reasons He is full of joy is because He is not worried or fearful. He is not surprised or afraid by all the plots of the devil and all the ways the devil brings chaos into situations. Instead, "the One enthroned in heaven laughs" (Psalm 2:4) and "in all things God works for the good of those who love Him, who have been called according to His purpose" (Romans 8:28). He is also unafraid of my failures and my poor choices. He believes in His redemptive power to restore all things, and this is available to me when I seek Him first.
Second, I came to see that God loves His children unconditionally. He created us already knowing all of the choices we would make that were not the best for us, but He never withdraws His love from us. And He always believes that we would turn around and choose Him. It's His kindness that leads us to repentance (Romans 2:4). In the story of the prodigal son, we see a father (who represents God) freely blessing his son. The son chose to abandon his father, went and wasted his father's inheritance, lived against all that his father had taught about what is right, and disgraced the family name. In the story, that son represents us. Eventually, the son came to his senses and came home, expecting his father to treat him with contempt—because he deserved it. But the father ran to him, kissed his face, threw an extravagant party for him celebrating his return, and gave him his position back in the house—instead of focusing on what the son did wrong. That is the love of God for us. It is unconditional.
Third, I came to understand that God believes in us. "God so loved the world that He gave His one and only Son, that whoever believes in Him shall not perish but have eternal life" (John 3:16). God, in all His wisdom, did not spare His only Son when He sent Him to the cross to die for all the sins we have committed. That's the value He has set on us. We are worth the trade! Leif Hetland puts it this way, "Jesus didn't die to make you valuable. He died because you are valuable." We tend to focus on our mistakes, but He is looking at what we can become with His Spirit in us. "He who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus" (Philippians 1:6). He believes in us so much that He calls us out of darkness and into light every single moment of every day.
My kids need me to reflect these things to them. I am God's representative to them. That's not prideful. God has appointed mothers to be His representatives, reflecting all that He is. That's our duty and our calling.
We haven't proven that we are worthy of God's love, yet He loves us. He doesn't love us "if" we behave a certain way; He just loves us. And I want to let me children know that they don't have to earn my approval and my love. They have it because they are mine. When they behave the worst, that's when they need me to love and believe in them the most. In correcting poor behavior we need to ask ourselves if our correction is from a place of anger and impatience or from a place of believing in them and loving them nonetheless. There is a huge difference in how the two play out.
We can create an atmosphere of joy in our homes. Just like God is full of joy, I need to be full of joy too! How can we talk about a good Father if we are not joyful mothers? I need to be able to renew my thinking every moment of everyday so I can laugh at the attempts of the enemy to discourage me, just like the One who is seated in Heaven laughs (Psalm 2:4)! Our children are very perceptive! If we are not filled with joy with the work of Motherhood, they will see that. It will affect the way they perceive their own value and worth, and they will not be able to trust that our God is a good God. (If we don't trust God completely, our children will see that, and it will determine their trust in God too.)
Our kids also need to know we believe in them. They need me to remind them how amazing they are. We are the first ones speaking into their hearts. I want them to know that they are not "accidents" but that they have a purpose that comes from heaven. When they behave the worst, I can look into their future and remind myself and them that they can be powerful men and women of God because they are chosen and set apart from before conception. That's what God says about all of us! "You knit me together in my mother’s womb. I praise You because I am fearfully and wonderfully made....Your eyes saw my unformed body; all the days ordained for me were written in Your book before one of them came to be" (Psalm 139). There is no reason not to prophesy these things over our children, because God has already planned my child's future, and I get to repeat the plan to my child! If I walk in His ways, my child's God-given destiny is set in stone!
Once we discover the truth about who God is and what He is like, there will be no stopping us from showing the same love we have so freely received from our Father to our children. Then we can change our behavior—and our children will notice. We can celebrate our children like God and heaven are already celebrating them.
So who is He to you? Ask yourself, "Do I see Him as a joyful and good God? Is He happy to see me? Does He celebrate me?" We need to set our eyes on Him, change our way of thinking, and renew our minds with the truth. My old thoughts and behavior patterns need to melt away with each revelation of God. This happens when we seek Him first. Then we can truly represent Him to our children.
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